Telecall : Insurance Agent

[Hindi used extensively in this post to reflect the true discussion]

Tring Tring...

and my mobile shows a local mumbai number ending in two zeroes

my first impression.. someone calling me from office

but the office number ends with 3 zeroes.. so this not from office.. relax!

anyways.. lets pick it up..

Me: Helloo

Caller: Helloo Sir!!

Me: yes?

Caller: Sir I am calling from &^%*^%*^& (not clearly audible)

Me: kahan se?

Caller: Sir, birla sun life insurance se..

Me: okk

Caller: sir.. hamari company ne ek naya insurance plan launch kiya hai.. 'Saral Jeevan'

Me: boss..I am not interested in insurance

Caller: arrrreeey sir.. sun to lijiye

Me: arey. jab interest hi nahi hai toh sun ke kya karna hai

Caller: areeeeyyy saaaaarrr.. knowledge ke liye sun lijiye.. aapka koi paisa thoda lag raha hai

Me: arey jab lena hi nahi to sun ke kya karna hai

Caller: areeeeyy sirr.. log knowledge ke liye kya kuch nahi karte.... kitne colleges mein jate hain.. kitni fees dete hain... aapko to baithe hue hi mil rahi hai

Me: arey .. nahi chahiye itni knowledge dost

Caller: arey sir.. knowledge to sabko chahiye hoti hai.. aap ko bhi chahiye hogi...

Me: nahi chahiye mere bhai

Caller: arey sir.. ye insurance ke bare mein hai.. wo to bahut important hai.. uski knowledge ho honi hi chahiye

Me: rehne de bhai

Caller: sir.. mein pooch sakta hun aapki age kitni hai

Me: 15 yrs

Caller: kitna? (amazed)

Me: 15 yrs

Caller: karte kya ho tum? (now tone relaxing to a less rehearsed casual tone)

Me: 10th ka board kar raha hun

Caller: hmmm..to is saal board diya hai tumne!!

Me: nahi.. abhi prep kar raha hun.. next yr doonga (me getting into the plot!)

Caller: arey yaar.. (slightly dejected)

ghar mein koi daddy waddy nahi hai kya?

Me: nahi hai

Caller: aur koi bada bhi nahi hai?

Me: nai hai

Caller: kahan hain daddy?

Me: gaye hain

Caller: office job pe gaye hain?

Me: haan

Caller: aacha apne daddy ka number de

Me: nahi

Caller: kyon

Me: mana kiya hai daddy ne kisi ko dene se

Caller: kabhi tak aayenge

Me: pata nahi

Caller: aacha unka number kya hai?

Me: nahi .. mana kiya hai

Caller: arey mere ko dede.. mere liye nahi mana karenge wo (sounded convincing and comforting)

Me: kyon nahi karenge.. aap unke dost ho kya? ( trying to show genuine interest in new found uncle)

Caller: nahi.. but insurance bahut zaroori hota hai na.. isiliye nahi karenge

Me: aisa kya?

Caller: haan.. aab har koi same to nahi hota na.. jaise maharashtra board hai.. cbse board hai ..

(and a few other boards mentioned.. and tone changes to the one used with the kid next door)

[Pause.. and he realises that he is getting into the flow of discussion and totally losing out on his agenda]

Caller: kab aate hain wo ghar..?

Me: har week aate hain

Caller: KYA!!... roz nahi aate (tail spin)

Me: nahi

Caller: kyon.. roz kyon nai aate?

Me: kaam rehta hai unko

[Another long pause]

Caller: aacha kab aate hain wo ghar [another desperate effort]

Me: kuch fix nai hai.. jab mann karta hai aa jate hain

Caller: aacha unka number kya hai?

Me: mana kiya unhone kisi ko batane se

He totally dejected.. and ran out of options

Caller: aacha chalo....ummmmm (still not wanting to keep it down.. and still thinking)

Me: byeee...C L I C K !